November 21, 2005

Traveling and Holidays with Your Loved One

Presenter: Lin Phillips, South Des Moines Alzheimer’s Support Group Facilitator

The person with Alzheimer’s Disease can absorb our anxiety and tension regarding our holiday preparations, but cannot express back how they feel about it. Their reflected anxiety can come out as “acting out.”

To help prepare your family member with Alzheimer’s Disease for holiday company,

• Bring out recent photos of people coming as guests to refresh his/her memory of who people are.
• Be careful not to overload the person’s senses with loud noises, flashing lights, lots of people.
• The person with Alzheimer’s Disease will be able to remember a lot about prior Christmases, but this may also be a time of great sadness for the care giver because of the awareness that this one is different. This may also be a big “let down” for the caregiver.
• Have a special treat planned for January 2 for the caregiver to handle the let down.
• Let guest know in advance that the person with Alzheimer’s cannot control his/her behavior and that behaviors can be very unpredictable.
• Plan to adapt traditions to make them simpler than prior years: e.g.: consider opening gifts earlier in the day rather than at night.
• Have a Memory Book at hand for the person with Alzheimer’s Disease to share with others. Label the pages in the first person: “I worked at, I lived at…”; start with pictures of the person as a small child, then move through to current times with pictures of grandchildren. Use one picture per page, and enlarge the picture to approximately 5x7 or larger. This is a good conversation starter
• When encountering others, reintroduce the guest by his/her first name, and continue to call them by name.
• Limit choices, such as “Would you like to wear the red sweater or the blue sweater”?
• Have the person help you wrap gifts, decorate the tree and house, go look at lights, etc. as able. Just remember to give time for rest.

Travel with the person with moderate Alzheimer’s Disease (Those who need to be cued and are losing some judgment):

• Trips should be short
• Have the person wear an ID such as Safe Return or MedicAlert bracelet or necklace, and make sure you as a primary caregiver is wearing one too.
• Keep daytime routine as much as possible
• Use night lights and lighted clocks to help with place orientation
• Try to provide more intimate setting for visiting others such as in the den with 2 or 3 people at a time versus in the living room with everyone nearby.
• Play music they love such as old hymns, music from when they were young, big band music, songs from musicals, etc.

Travel with the person with later stage Alzheimer’s Disease: (Remember these folks lose the ability to see in three dimensions and have difficulty judging depth.)

• Use a lot of color contrast between seating and floor, toilet and floor, bathtub and walls, etc.
• Use rhythm to help console if the person gets upset: e.g. rock in a rocking chair, favorite music, read poetry
• Have a teddy bear to hug
• No more large group stuff. If possible, do the visits one to one at their place.
• Take props for the visit, things that are highly tactile, have memorable scents, etc.
• When traveling, mimic the home environment as much as possible. Stay in bed and breakfasts rather than large hotels.
• Pack and carry an emergency kit packed with things that would calm the person down such as a Memory Book, something they can fiddle with, a spare set of clothes, medications, snacks, water.
• Make and distribute small calling cards that say: “My companion has memory trouble. Please include them in the discussion even though at times they seem to be confused.”
• Be extremely conscious of the safety of the environment: Make sure there is a scald guard on the hot water, use a safety bolt on the door, or a chair propped in front of the door. You may also want to use portable door alarms to let you know if the person is wandering at night.

Gift suggestions for the Person with Alzheimer’s Disease:

• Stuffed animal, baby dolls
• Clothing such as warm soft clothing that is simple to manage such as sweat suits, duplicate outfits, underwear
• things they enjoyed in the past such as trains or tractors,
• CD’s of favorite music,
• Family, nature, animal, baby or religious videos,
• home visit from a barber, hairdresser
• small exercise equipment such as soft sponge balls, scarves,
• body pillow for bed.
• Safe Return registration
• Short drives and outings
• Pages for a “Life Story” / Memory Book
• Photo magazine subscription
• Favorite foods
• Bird feeder
• Apron with pockets
• Collage with labeled photos
• Tapes of sermons, the choir of the church services
• Afghans

Gift Suggestions for the Caregiver:

• Cordless phone
• Hand held shower nozzle
• VCR or DVD with tapes of musicals, classics
• Exit alarms for doors
• Portable cassette player with headphones
• Subscriptions to picture magazines such as Birds and Blooms, Sunset
• Intercoms that are battery powered
• Respite services
• Prepared meals
• Chore assistance
• Books on Alzheimer’s Disease and family care giving
• Gift certificates for errand or transportation services
• Knowledge of resources